first, i'd like to state that the 'instinct' test has to be passed if a player is to be considered a Hall of Famer. When you think Rafael Palmeiro, do you think "Hall of Famer?" I don't. Therefore, I don't think he's a Hall of Famer.

When I hear the name "Griffey, Jr.," I think Hall of Famer. When I hear Clemens or Big Unit, I think Hall of Famer. When I hear Sosa, I think, sadly, Hall of Famer. When I hear Biggio, I think Hall of Famer. When I hear Pujols, I think Hall of Famer.

When I hear Palmeiro, I don't.

[Are there fringy guys I do think should be in? G. Anderson. Nope. B. Wagner? Maybe. T Hoffman? Yes. M. Alou? No.]

However, based on this logic, Ron Santo is a Hall of Famer, but Don Larsen isn't. Based on this, it seems, Eddie Murray might not be either [although I don't remember his peak, of course.]

It just seems to me that Palmeiro doesn't pass the "Best Player at His Position for a Few Years" test which, it seems to me, is a pretty good determinant of whether he is a Hall of Famer. Who is in the 3,000-500 club? I haven't looked it up, but I know the answer is "Only Hall of Famers." But he doesn't exude greatness. He doesn't have a signature moment [except for this past March.]. I know he's in, and I guess he's earned it, but it doesn't make me comfortable.

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I have made three phone calls specifically to sing the praises of About a Boy by Nick Hornby. It's very breezy and very quick but so so smart.

Rough sketch: Independently wealthy [and therefore unemployed] mid-30's [I think] guy invents an infant son so that he can attend support group for single parents, mostly because hot single moms, while hot, have trouble finding mates. Because, you know, they're moms.

Indirectly, through the group, he meets a not-hot single mom, whose son begins stopping by his apartment. The guy becomes, roughly, a friend of the young boy. He is not, of course, the young boy's dad.

Dialogue:
Adult [who likes a new woman]: "Anyway, The point is, this woman thinks you're my son."
Boy [not his son]: "So tell her I'm not."
A: "No."
B: "Why not?"
A: "We're just going around in circles here. Why can't you just accept the facts?"

I hope I'm not the only one who finds that exchange hilarious.

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I have been trying to get in contact with a friend. A friend who lives in the eastern time zone and who, therefore, has to wait until 10 to hear from me, who doesn't get free minutes until nine. I called my friend both Tuesday and Wednesday night.

Thursday, I receive a return message, one of the greatest messages I've ever received:

"Hey pal, this is [XX]. I'm sorry I've missed your calls over the past few days but, uh, when I got them, I was, uh, uh, making out."

Why this message was outstanding: If you knew this guy, you'd know why it was great.
B) Because, while my call was made during the evening [prime making out time], he returned in the afternoon, and decided to include the making out information.