Back in January, I returned to Glenview. Present in Glenview, and never in places where I controlled the purchase of groceries, were sweets. Various varieties of not-quite-as-bad-for-you-as-most candies and ice cream bars and ice cream sandwiches and cinammon twists and sherbert-and-cream concoctions and cookies. "Light" varieties. Every flavor scope was covered - fruity, chocolate-y, toffee-y. Truly, a cornucopia of goodness for the sweet-toothed - with reservations - individual.

(I should note here that, previous to January, I would often acquire these things through irregular shipments from the old homestead, or personal deliveries from visiting siblings, or through 200-dollar grocery store visits on weekend appearances. I never bought the stuff, but it certainly had a sporadic - and brief - presence.)

As the weakest-willed person I know, I would often eat these concoctions by the package, particularly the French Toast and Maple "twists" and the Trader Joe's Cat Cookies (ginger, chocolate, and ... vanilla, I guess...mmm, especially with milk).

Three weeks in to the ring-fingernail experiment, I've successfully depleted the supply of sweets that came here with me. (Actually, it was more like ten days.) Gone is the Zip-Lock bag containing equal parts peanut butter and caramel candies (eaten over a two-day stretch, with one given to the R/DS), gone are the Cat Cookies (eaten three snack-size baggies at a time, with a glass of milk, over a one-week period), and gone are the cinammon twists (a one-night binge on my first Saturday in town).

So let's say that you (or rather, I) enjoy the sweet stuff, but fear your (my) own weak will. What do you (I) do here?

The solution has come in the form of the sweet, splendid goodness of the mango. I've always (since 2003) been an occasional mango-eater, but now, my friends, I've become a fringe mango-addict. Well, one a day, anyway. So, so sweet, and better than chocolate, I think. Yum.

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I made an important discovery on Saturday night. I met the R/DS and another coworker at a lame sports bar at the end of the third quarter of the Suns-Lakers Game Seven. They had left for the bar at the half, but I needed 45 minutes away from the R/DS, to be sure.

From one sports bar to another, both equally pretty-lame, and then the R/DS called it a night. Co-worker and I headed to a third establishment, closing it, and then to my new Mecca. (Please note, Dad, that we "used good judgment": a one- or two-beer per establishment rate - nothing extreme - and none for me at the first one, owing to very bad bartending.)

Mecca, thy name is X&X Lounge.

Upon entering, co-worker and I were greeted by the sight of an odd thirty-something man posing as a bouncer, and by the sound of The White Stripes. And not "Fell in Love With a Girl" or "Seven-Nation Army," but something cooler. Smell? Smoky. Touch? Greasy, I guess. Taste? Nothing immediate, although the gyros are highly-regarded.

After confirming our viability with the real bouncer (Norm McDonald says: "Hello, real cops?"), we sauntered towards the back. And as we sat down with some co-workers (coincidental meeting), my eyes drifted to a banner at the back of the facility:

Moosehead Pints
One Dollar
"All Day, Every Day"

A waitress arrived. "What would you like?" "That sign says 'Dollar Moosehead. All Day, Every Day.' Is that true?" (A tip of the hat to The Chris Farley Show). "Yeah." "I'll have a one-dollar Moosehead, please."

A few moments later, my one-dollar Moosehead arrived. As did the sounds of Death Cab for Cutie. Not "Soul Meets Body" or "Crooked Teeth" or "The Sound of Settling," but a track not used on The O.C.

I consider this a small victory, and a big step in my potential enjoyment of the ring-fingernail.

(Note for future or current Twin Citizens: I could not find a link for The X&X Lounge, but I did find this. What's this? Well, scroll down to Lloyd Duncan's response. Lloyd, on June 19, 2004, reported that, from the top of the IDS Building in Minneapolis, one can clearly see the X&X Lounge. I find this difficult to believe. I also find it difficult to believe that my google search for "X&X Lounge" yielded this link on the first page.

Mecca needs a web presence, I think.)

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New Weekly Feature Alert:
(This is also my only weekly feature.)

As my primary act of villainy, I'd like to introduce Why I Dislike the R/DS Vignette or Foible of the Week (WIDiRVoFOW, pronounced "Wi-DERVE-a-fow," though it looks oddly like "with the," a clause that is properly pronounced "Wif-Da").

This week's reason:
He loves to hear his own voice.

Supporting Assertion:
He never says "because." Instead, he says, "for the simple fact that," which is a) cumbersome and b) three times the syllables.

Supporting Evidence:
"I think I'm ready to go home, guys, for the simple fact that it's pretty late and I'm starting to fade." Said Saturday night, at approximately 11:30.

Surprising Revelation Alert!!!

Why I Like the R/DS:
He makes for good copy.